Your cereal is satisfying, and you feel fresh for the day ahead. But there’s bad news. Word of your Oatcake snub has reached Radio Stoke, who cancel all their scheduled programming (“Robbie Williams Live from Trentham Monkey Forest”) to report on your act of disrespect towards the humble Oatcake. Jim on Radio Stoke has already called up to call you a disgrace and a fascist. You want to ring and defend yourself, you just fancied Corn Flakes! That’s all! It wasn’t intended as a deliberate swipe against the good people of Stoke-on-Trent, but there isn’t time. You get to the stadium, being pelted with Oatcakes as you head inside. It’s time to pick the team. Do you…?